These Last Few Months

These Last Few Months

Wow. It's almost hard to believe that my family has managed to pack everything into these last few months. We've managed to cram what has felt like a decade worth of major life changes into a few short months. And I can't really say it's all been good.

As many of you know, we recently became a family of 4. And then very quickly became a family of 3 once again. A few short weeks after Baby J was born, Mr. A deployed. For months we were on pins and needles hoping that he would be here to witness the birth of his son, and thankfully he was. But when the Army comes calling, you don't really have much say. We were very blessed that he managed to spend a few short weeks with his son before deploying. I managed to nearly blind them both trying to capture as many photographs of the two of them together before their time together was over.

It's difficult to put in words how ironic it is to welcome your new bundle of joy into the world while simultaneously saying goodbye to your partner. There is joy, so much joy at the thought of new life, and then there's a bit of emptiness when you realize your husband won't be around to see most of his  son's major milestones. Then there is just overwhelming fear and sadness. And then it starts to get just a bit better because you learn to take it one day at a time.

The getting better part is just starting. It was preceded by nearly 5 months of pure bad luck and even worse timing. So far if I had to give 2018 a title, it would be called The Year of Suck. I thought about sugar coating this post and talking about how quickly we have all fallen into our routine, but to be honest, we're still trying to figure things out. For now, I'm learning how to navigate what it means to be a mother of a new babe and a seven year old while the other half of my heart is on the other side of the globe. This process has involved lots of tears, counseling, learning how to ask for help, and most importantly learning how to give myself grace. These two depend on it.

This next chapter in our lives will likely be one of the most difficult, but there's nowhere to really go but forward. So we're taking it one day at a time. Keeping busy and creating memories in the process.

I had actually considered ending my blog here. I felt like maybe I had reached a point in my life where there was no time for it. But then I realized just how much I need this space. It's become my little part of the world where I can just be. And I think in the coming year, this space will be more important than ever. I can't always promise to be consistent, or present, but this year I hope to continue sharing little snippets of our lives here and there. So stay tuned, the best is still yet to come.

Until next time,

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